Passion and Job Satisfaction

Passion Pays

When you are passionate about what you do, you do better and you enjoy it more.

By F. John Reh, About.com Guide

Thank God it's Monday.

Do you look forward to Monday morning? Are you raring to go back to work? Or are you a TGIF (Thank God it's Friday) kind of person who can't wait to get away from the job for a couple of days? You spend at least 8 hours a day at the job. That is almost 25% of your week. If you are a TGIF person you are missing something really important in your work life - passion. 

 

Being passionate about your job is more than the old adage "do what you love". It's looking forward to going to work. It's time flying by when you're there. It's working past quiting time, not because you're swamped with work, but because you were so intent you didn't notice the time.

When you are passionate about what you do for a living you enjoy it more. You also do it better. You are more committed to the success of the operation if you believe in it passionately.

Putting your passion to work

The trick is not just to feel passionately about your job, but to act passionately too. Use you passion to move projects ahead, to find innovative solutions to perplexing problems, to work through the interpersonal conflicts. 

 

If you act passionately, you won't sit passively through another boring meeting. You can't. You will share that passion with the others in the meeting. Your energy can lift all of them. Even if it doesn't, you will feel better knowing you are doing something to advance the cause in which you believe passionately.

Passionate people get more done. They don't spend time worrying about what they have to do next. They don't scheme about how to get out of doing something. And they don't have to waste time dreaming about a vacation they want to take to get away from the job.

People who are passionate about their work do a better job. Since they care so much about the work, they don't settle for anything less than their best. They don't ever "just go through the motions." The pour all their thought and energy into doing the job well.

It's just a job, isn't it?

If you feel that work is just a job, you are wasting 40 or more hours a week of your life. You are shortchanging your employer who gets less than your best effort. You are shortchanging yourself by wasting time on routine or even drudgery instead of spending that time doing what you enjoy. You could, and should, spend those 40 hours instead doing something that makes you feel good.

Not convinced?

If you have ever had a job that you felt passionately about, you know what I mean. If you have never worked at a job like that, you may wonder just how valid these statements are. If that's the case, think about something away from work that you are passionate about. Maybe it's a hobby or a sport, an activity with a special group of friends or that quiet activity where you recharge your energies. 

 

Ever miss dinner because you were shooting hoops and didn't notice how late it had gotten? Do you know the intensity and concentration you feel when you are working on your radio-controlled models? Have you ever wondered where the day went when you were antique hunting with your best friend? Those are the the passions we enjoy in our time away from work. You get the same charge when you work at a job you are passionate about. Try it and see if you don't agree.

If you have any questions or comments about this article, or if there is an issue you would like us to address, please post them on our Management Forum to share with the entire group. 

My Thoughts

If you can't wait for the weekend to end so you can go back to work you are a rare breed (endangered, perhaps?).  I've always been passionate about my work.  Or so I thought.  I think I need to re-read this article several times for me to gauge my passion for my work.  

HOW NOT TO MISS DEADLINES

Never Miss a Deadline Again
By Laura Vanderkam | July 21, 2011
http://www.bnet.com/blog/time-management/never-miss-a-deadline-again/548?promo=713&tag=nl.e713

Every weekend, I list my priorities for the upcoming week. I find that organizing my life in 168-hour chunks gives me a good sense of how I should be spending my hours. When work gets really busy, though, I start scheduling in priorities by the hour Monday through Thursday.

But never Friday.

Why not? Because Friday is my margin time.

Inevitably, something will come up Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday that I haven’t planned for. It could be an exciting new opportunity that I need to seize, or it could be a long, drawn-out game of phone and fax tag required to move my medical records from one doctor’s office to another. Either way, that means that something that was supposed to happen during the first part of the week won’t get finished.

If Friday is chock-full too, then I’d run the risk of not completing a priority during that week. Rather than let that happen, I do what I can to keep at least Friday afternoon as open as possible.

Sure, building in a cushion is sometimes difficult. But the pay-off comes in peace of mind. You don’t necessarily have to work until 10PM on Wednesday, because you know there’s an open block on Friday waiting for you. And hey, if everything goes perfectly during the week, then you can spend Friday relaxing! This will never actually happen, but hey, it’s nice to dream.

When do you build in margin time?

MY THOUGHTS

Very sensible indeed! Better start trying out this margin time. I think it will work. Most definitely.

5 Ways You Sabotage Your Own Career

5 Ways You Sabotage Your Own Career

from the article "Are You Sabotaging Your Own Career? Probably"
By Steve Tobak | July 12, 2011

5 Ways You Sabotage Your Own Career without realizing it:

    Believing that someone else is the problem. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say the odds that there’s some conspiracy to hold you back, that everyone’s out to get you, that opportunity’s there for all but you, or that all your bosses and coworkers are raging a**holes and backstabbing villains, are zero. That’s right; it’s you. And thinking it isn’t, well, that’s what actually holds you back.

    Putting yourself ahead of your company. I know it’s counterintuitive, but the best way to get ahead is to put the needs of your company first, and for the simple reason that doing your job well and going above and beyond the call of duty will come back to you eventually. That’s just the way it works. Nobody’s going to go out on a limb and shower you with raises and promotions until you prove yourself capable, which means getting results … for the company.

    Thinking you know better instead of listening and learning. Those who act as if they know it all and have overinflated opinions of themselves are usually overcompensating for deep feelings of inferiority and insecurity. And you know what? Everyone knows it but them. So, when you act that way instead of listening and learning, it’s like holding up a giant sign that says, “I act big but I really feel small.”

    Feeling entitled to something, anything. People throw the “entitlement” word around a lot these days, but there’s a simple truth in business: You’re not entitled to squat. If that’s news to you, then good, you heard it here first. Oh, except for one thing. You’re entitled to work your tail off and maybe someday make something of yourself; that’s about it. The truth is that whatever you feel entitled to you’ll never get.

    Drinking the Kool-Aid, i.e. that there’s some magic secret to getting ahead. Becoming successful in the real world requires every bit of whatever brains God gave you, the wisdom you learned along the way, and pretty much all your energy and focus. By definition, every brain cycle and moment you spend thinking there’s a better way - a magic way - works against you by detracting from what it really takes to succeed: brains, hard work, and learning from experience.

MY THOUGHTS

How can I not agree?  All the points presented are self-destructing-blaming others, self first before company, being a know-it-all, entitlement which is brought about by a terrible sin called pride, taking shortcuts to success. Time to ask yourself some questions. Are you or are you not?

HOWTOWORKFOR A NARCISSISTIC LEADER

How to Survive Working for a Narcissistic Leader
By Margaret Heffernan | May 19, 2011

Times of great change require leaders who have immense vision, courage and the capacity to ignore what everyone else is doing. Many would put BP’s John Browne and the now-imprisoned former IMF president Dominique Strauss-Kahn in this same category.

You don’t necessarily like these people, but they can lead you to great success and may be the only leaders capable of delivering true, galvanic change. Being part of their ride can be exhilarating, instructive, inspiring and lucrative. But they aren’t easy people to work with - and they have very distinct and important drawbacks.

What is a narcissist?

Psychoanalysts describe narcissistic personalities as independent, innovative, drawn to power and glory. They rarely suffer from doubt or second thoughts and can come across as very aggressive. Their extreme absorption in their own vision blinds them to risks, problems or nuance.  Being part of their ride can be exhilarating, instructive, inspiring and lucrative. But hanging on for that ride is emotionally and professionally taxing.

If their vision is wrong, they’ll lead everyone over the cliff and never notice. The other problem is that, while their inter-personal skills are poor, they will take all dissent personally. They may not be sensitive to others - but any slight or criticism is felt very personally indeed.

Here are some tips learned on the roller coaster:

1. Play to the upside.

Narcissists are sometimes great leaders because they have vision and are sufficiently self-absorbed not to care (or even notice) how mad they may appear to others. There’s little value in trying to change this. If you want radical change, it won’t be delivered by sensitive leaders but by those so caught up in their own vision that they can’t see anything else. You will have to learn not to mind their faults. But don’t become impervious to them - you need to retain your ability to distinguish their greatness from their potential madness.

2. Don’t even think of competing.

No ego can match, never mind annihilate, the ego of the narcissist. What you have to decide is whether their achievement will facilitate your success. If it will, that’s fine. If these two are at odds, get out now.

3. Help them privately.

While narcissists may think they know everything, the smart ones know they need help. But they won’t show this - or want it demonstrated - in public. So find a back channel: private time alone, email, phone calls. Smart narcissists will absorb all your great insight, data and advice and effortlessly fold it into their own thinking. Don’t expect acknowledgement, gratitude or thanks - but don’t abdicate either. Many narcissists are smart and they need your insights, even if they’ll never acknowledge that.

4. Decide how to deal with the bullying.

Most narcissists are also bullies, subject to tremendous rage. There are 2 ways to manage this: ignore it, like water off a duck’s back (if you truly can) or stand up to it early. Your refusal to be insulted or abused will carry weight because there is nothing a narcissist hates more than losing an audience.

5. Accept that narcissists have no desire to change.

Even if they’re wreaking havoc, they won’t care. They know they’re right. If you think you can change them, you’re wrong, will waste time - and endure a lot of abuse along the way.

The tragedy of narcissists, of course, is that having defeated a mighty foe or delivered epic change, they are the very last people to enjoy the fruits of their labor. If you let them, they’ll destroy what they’ve built. So the  critical question, when dealing with narcissistic leaders is this: Are we in a situation that needs this level of drive, radical intensity and vision? If you are, it could be that only a narcissist will get you there.

MY THOUGHTS

Definitely going to be a challenge!

WHAT MOST SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE DO BEFORE BREAKFAST

What The Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast
By Laura Vanderkam | May 17, 2011

http://www.bnet.com/blog/time-management/what-the-most-successful-people-do-before-breakfast/439?promo=664&tag=nl.e664

Mornings are a mad-cap time in many households. Everyone’s so focused on getting out the door that you can easily lose track of just how much time is passing. I’ve had hundreds of people keep time logs for me over the past few years (you can see some of mine here and here), and I’m always amazed to see gaps of 90 minutes or more between when people wake up and when they start the commute or school car pool.

That would be fine if the time was used intentionally, but often it isn’t.

The most productive people, however, realize that 90 minutes, 120 minutes or more is a long time to lose track of on a busy weekday. If you feel like you don’t have time for personal priorities later in the day, why not try using your mornings? Streamline breakfast, personal care and kid routines. Then you can use 30-60 minutes to try one of four things:

1. Play, read, or talk with your kids. Mornings can be great quality time, especially if you have little kids who go to bed soon after you get home at night, but wake up at the crack of dawn. Set an alarm on your watch, put away the iPhone, and spend a relaxed half an hour reading stories or doing art projects. If you have older children, aim for a leisurely family breakfast. Everyone talks through their plans for the day and what’s going on in their lives. If family dinners aren’t a regular thing in your house, this is a great substitute.

2. Exercise. You shower in the morning anyway, so why not get sweaty first? Trade off mornings with your partner on who goes out and runs and who stays home with the kids. Or, if your kids are older (or you don’t have any) work out together and make it a very healthy morning date.

3. Indulge your creative side. Lots of people would like to resurrect a creative hobby like painting, photography, scrapbooking, writing, even practicing an instrument. What if you went to bed a little earlier three times a week? Skip that last TV show or those last emails and get up a little earlier the next morning to put in some time at your easel before the day gets away from you.

4. Think. Strategic thinking time is incredibly important for seizing control of our lives. Spend 30 minutes in the morning pondering what you want to do with your time. You could also use this time to pray or read religious literature, to meditate or write in a journal. All of these will help you start the day in a much better place than if everyone’s running around like chickens with their heads cut off.

Note: Are you looking for a better start to your day, or to use your time more effectively in general? I’d like to do a few time makeovers of readers over the next few weeks. Email me if you’d be interested in logging your time, trying a few strategies, and sharing what you learn. Thanks!

MY THOUGHTS

Time with the kids. Exercise. Be creative. Think.  Those are some of the things most succesful do first thing in the morning.  But what about happy people?  What do they do the minute they wake up?

REGAIN YOUR ATTENTION SPAN

6 Ways to Regain Your Attention Span
By Wayne Turmel | May 11, 2011

Does it feel like there are too many little things nibbling at you to actually get any real work done? Just when we settle in to work on the Johnson project, Facebook needs updating, Instant Messenger goes off and there’s that email from your partner  in Dallas. How are we supposed to get any work done? We need to rebuild our attention spans.

Too many of us spend our time working like Dug, the dog from the movie “Up”. We get distracted at odd moments (SQUIRREL!) and find it hard to focus. By becoming aware of our tendencies and setting support systems in place we can regain our focus.

Tony Schwartz, the author of The Way We’re Working Isn’t Working, has some ideas. In a recent  Management Exchange blog post, he offers 6 tips for regaining the focus we once had.

    1.  Let your values guide your behaviors -  Do you really not know what is most important. While it sounds trite, we need to focus on the things we know to be most valuable. If we thought about it for even a second, is updating our Facebook page really more important than doing a good job on the data for our team? Really?

    2.  Slow down - Paradoxically, the faster we move the less we often accomplish. Our brains are incapable of multi-tasking, instead we have to switch from one task to the next and each switch has ramp-up and cool-down time associated with it. By sticking with one task until it’s complete (or there’s an organic, natural place to take a break) and then moving to the next task we will get more done and at a higher quality of work.

    3.  Build deliberate practices that become habits - This one is going to hurt a bit. Many of us have to retrain our brains to stick with one thing at a time. Research shows that ritual and habit are the best ways to make sure we do something in a certain way. The problem is, it takes doing something over and over again until it becomes a habit. Start by blocking an hour (okay, half an hour if you start to get the shakes) in which the focus is the most important work you’ll do that day. Don’t check email, turn off the ringer on the phone. Just do what you need to do. If we did this every day for a couple of weeks, it would becomeour default way of working.

    4.  Create “precommitments” to keep you on track - This is a polite way of saying you need to burn your boats so you can’t escape. If email is a distraction, turn off your internet connection while you’re working on that memo. Don’t freak out, it has an on switch as well. If we commit to eliminating possible distractions and nonproductive behaviors, not only will we be more focused on the work at hand, but they won’t be there to tempt us at all.

    5.  Share your commitments - Most of us are really bad at keeping promises to ourselves,but pretty good about maintaining our commitments to others. By sharing your commitment to manage your time better, we’ll be motivated to achieve those goals. We’ll also get some help from those who work witg us. (If you ask your teammates to give you an hour in the morning before the IMs start flying, you may just get it). If everyone knows what everyone else is trying to achieve you can hold each other accountable.

    6.  Start small - Rome wasn’t built in a day, and going cold-turkey with some of these distractions won’t work very well either. As Schwartz points out, the attention part of our brain acts like a muscle. Try to make it do something it hasn’t done in a while is likely to result in a serious mind-cramp. Still with practice and repetition, we can change our default settings.

For some it will take longer than others. Don’t be afraid to ask for help and reach out to the team members who seem to be struggling with maintaining their focus as well. (SQUIRREL!).

MY THOUGHTS

I love this tips.  They are not necessarily easy but they all seem doable.

Okay, for most of us it’s still a work in progress.

DO YOU HAVE A GOOD JOB?

Do you have a good job? Take the test


Today's job market favors employees. The attitude of most workers is that they should have a job that makes them happy. So it's no surprise that at any given time 70 percent of the workforce is job hunting, according to the Wall St. Journal.

Everyone is looking for the right position. But what exactly does that mean?

Here is something it's probably not: Prestigious. People who chase fame and prestige are generally not as happy as other people. If you're after fame, you are setting goals that are dependent on other peoples' approval. Conversely, goals about self-acceptance and friendship make you happy because you have more control over them.

You might think you're different – that you have a legitimate shot at fame. Ninety percent of young workers think they are in the top 10 percent of all workers, according to Business Week. Also, 40 percent think they will become famous. The reality is 1 or 2 percent ever achieve a modicum of fame.

A good rule of thumb when choosing a job to make you happy is to pick one that is based on the following list of attributes.

To test a job to see if it's good, give the job points for each attribute it has:

1. A short, predictable commute – 1 point

The problem with a long commute is that it is long in a different way each day. Sometimes it's the rain, sometimes there's an accident. Sometimes traffic is backed up for no apparent reason. Humans can acclimate themselves to a lot of traumatic stuff – even being a paraplegic, according to Daniel Gilbert, author of Stumbling on Happiness. But you cannot acclimate yourself to something that is bad in a different way every day.

2. Workflow you can manage – 1 point

This is not about doing work. This is about managing your personal life, which you cannot do if you have no control over your workflow. You need to be able to predict when things will be difficult and when it's safe to focus more on your personal life. This is why management consultants are generally happy – they oversee their own schedule. But those who hold client-heavy jobs, such as lawyers or financial analysts, have to jump at a clients' whim.

3. Clear goals that are challenging – 1 point

Goals that are not challenging result in boredom, not happiness. But challenging work without a clear goal is a bad job waiting to happen because people want to know how they're doing. But you can't get feedback from a boss who does not set clear goals to manage your progress.

It is worth noting that the primary cause of workplace burnout is not the amount of time spent working, but whether the work you did can make a difference. For example, nurses on the pediatric burn unit have high turnover because it is exhausting to be taking care of children without being able to stop their suffering. Conversely, entrepreneurs are typically happy because they have so much control over workflow and goals.

4. Two co-workers you're close friend with – 3 points

If you have two good friends at work, you are almost guaranteed to like your job, according to Tom Rath, the author of Vital Friends. This is, in part, because you can process the bad parts of a job more productively with friends by your side to help you.

So finding a job you like or turning a bad job in to a good job might actually be totally under your control; you can decide you are going to be likable and make friends, or not.

Test results:

0-2 points, probably not a good job

3 points, probably a good job

4 – 6 points, probably a really good job

MY THOUGHTS

How did you fare? If you scored 0-2 points, don't go running off to another job. There are ways and ways to improve your lot - find a place nearer your work, manage your time and leave enough room for the unexpected, set your own challenging goals (if your boss won't do it for you), and go and forge those friendships. Two friends from a throng of people is not too much to ask. Unless you're with a bunch of freaks working in a dysfunctional organization.

GET TO WORK ON TIME

Get To Work On Time...Or Else
Best Excuses For Being Late

By F. John Reh, About.com Guide

Mar 1 2011
In economic times like these, when there are at least 10-15 applicants for every job opening, employees who still have jobs are making more of an effort to get to work on time according to a recent survey by CareerBuilder.com. But that doesn't mean that those who are late don't have interesting reason or excuses for their tardiness.

The survey, conducted in November and December 2010, found that 15 percent of workers admitted to being late for work at least once once a week, down from 16 percent the previous year and 20 percent in 2008. It may be worth noting that the economic downturn did not begin until late in 2008. According to the survey, one-third (32 percent) of employers said they have terminated an employee for being late. Some are more lenient.

Reasons For Being Late

The survey found the most often used excuses were

* traffic-related (30 percent),
* lack of sleep (19 percent),
* bad weather (9 percent), and
* childcare issues (8 percent).

Our Survey

An About.com survey of managers revealed a variety of creative and interesting excuses used by employees who are late for work. These include:

* My wife's brother got arrested on our front lawn, and we were fighting whose fault it was.

* I had to go to the doctor because I have triple pneumonia. (And, were those his exact words.)

* A young lady, who lived a short distance away, did not arrive on time (because) having a pencil skirt on, she could not walk quickly.

* The cat was sick and I had to clean up after her.

* her boyfriend was involved in a fender bender and ended up getting in a shouting match with the other driver who then stabbed him in the neck and drove off.

* He had to take time off to shop for a new phone because he'd dropped his in the toilet that AM and he couldn't live a minute without a cellphone. He's no longer with us.

* She and her spouse argued whose turn it was to stay home when their son woke up sick that morning.

* He had to go and search for his wedding ring, which he thought he had dropped on a gravel road the night before while hunting.

* Her electric garage door opener wouldn't work because of a blown fuse and she had to wait for her husband to come manually raise the door.

* Her son woke up with a loose tooth missing and she had to stay home till he pooped so she could find it.

* The storm knocked out my power and the alarm did not go off.

* I will be late cuz last night there was a storm and I could not get my underwear to dry.

* The Army have exercises in the morning and they blocked the only exit from the complex.

* I would have been here on time if all those other cars weren't on the streets.

The employee whose excuse was "I was too tired to come in on time, so I decided to sleep in and rest up to be more productive" no longer works there.

What's Your Excuse

What is the best, most amusing excuse you have heard? Or have used yoursef? Share the best one you've heard.

MY THOUGHTS

i doubt managers find these excuses amusing. especially if the person concerned is an habitual latecomer. if he's habitually late, i'm surprised he's still allowed to make these excuses (if e still had the job!)

Ways to End Up With a Career You Hate

Five Sure-fire Ways to End Up With a Career You Hate
Oct. 7 2010 - 5:28 pm | 2,860 views | 0 recommendations | 0 comments
Posted by Chrissy Scivicque

I spend a lot of time sharing information on how to love your career. I talk about making thoughtful decisions, establishing a path and actively managing your goals.

But, equally important, is avoiding those roads that will lead to inevitable career unhappiness. Sometimes, they’re hard to spot. But I’ve found five that are clear, unmistakable danger zones. Take a look below and make every effort to avoid these traps.

1. “…but I’m good at this”

So, it’s not something you want to do, it’s something you can do. I get it. Sounds good at first. Take advantage of your skills and all that. But sooner or later, it wears thin. I see this quite often with mid-career professionals. They’ve been chugging right along, doing what they do, and suddenly they realize they’ve been sucked into a void of discontent. Don’t dedicate your energy to something just because you have the ability. You deserve to be at least somewhat selective. And if you desperately want to do something that you’re not naturally good at, you always have the power to grow your skills.

2. “…but I need the money.”

It sounds like such an obviously bad idea and yet, so many people fall for this one. Money isn’t enough to keep you happy for long. Yes, we all have financial needs that must be met. But, if that’s the sole reason you’re in your career, prepare for misery my friend. There are—literally—MILLIONS of ways to make money. Find something that offers another kind of satisfaction as well. Compensation comes in many forms and your paycheck is just one.

3. “Things will get better.”

Staying the course and hoping that things improve is a sure-fire way to waste time. If you’re in a career that’s making you miserable, it’s probably safe to say that things can’t change enough to make it worthwhile staying. Maybe they can. Maybe your awful boss will retire and you’ll be promoted and the company will be purchased by Google. But I like to encourage a proactive mindset. Do what you can to improve the situation and, if things don’t change significantly and quickly, start the process of moving on. Don’t stick with it just because you feel invested. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that things will just magically get better with time.

4. “I’m afraid.”

If fear is holding you back, you’re not alone. This is the number one reason people stay in careers they don’t enjoy. The unknown path is always scary. But be honest with yourself. If you never confront your fear, you’ll never know what could have been. You don’t want to look back on your life at the age of 70 and have regrets or questions. A few calculated risks lead to a life well-lived. Maybe not always an easy or expected life, but one you can be proud of.

5. “Nothing else would be any better.”

This is the kind of thinking that takes over when you’re unhappy. You just give up. And it’s my job to remind everyone—yes, everyone—that there are ways to find happiness at work. No one is cursed with the miserable career plague. It’s a temporary state, IF you are willing to do the work. Don’t ever believe you’re stuck.

The kind of thinking described above is normal and tempting. We all fall into these thought patterns on occasion. The good news is that you can snap yourself right out of it. You CAN find career nourishment.

MY THOUGHTS

a job that makes you miserable? of course it sucks. and the power to make it better is in your hands. moving on may not necessarily mean moving to a new job. what's the guarantee that it's going to be better? moving on does not also mean moving now. unless your job will bring you to your grave this very minute. i'm talking of real threats to you and your family. otherwise, move with caution. take heed of the points presented in this article. but check and double check if you are the reason you have a miserable job.

Four Ways to Make a Bad Job Good

Four Ways to Make a Bad Job Good
by Penelope Trunk

The best way to be happier at work is to take personal responsibility for your workplace well-being. Any job can be better than it is right now.

Here are four ways you can improve your job instead of relying on your boss or your company to change:

1. Make a friend at work.

People with one friend at work are much more likely to find their work interesting. And people with three friends at work are virtually guaranteed to be very satisfied with their life, according to extensive research from Gallup published in the book "Vital Friends" by Tom Rath. These findings are independent of what a person's job entails, and what their home life is like.

On one level, this isn't surprising. We're better equipped to deal with hardship if we have friends near us, and we have more fun when we're with friends. So a friend allows us to deal with the ups and downs of work much more easily.

We often think of work and life as separate, and consequently fortify our home life with friends. But we need different friends for different contexts. Having someone you can count on at work to care about you and understand you feeds your soul in a way that used to apply only at home.

Of course, once you have this information, you have to figure out the most effective ways to make friends at work. Because friends don't just materialize in your cubicle -- you need to cultivate them.

2. Decrease your commute time by moving closer to work.

More than three million people have a commute that lasts more than 90 minutes. Many of them justify this commute by saying that their job is worth it, or that it allows them to have a bigger house. But the commute may be doing them great harm at home and at work.

Humans can adjust to almost any amount of bad news, according to Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert. In his book "Stumbling on Happiness," he shows that we think losing a limb will be terrible, but in fact we adjust to it pretty well. In fact, in the long run it generally doesn't affect our level of happiness.

A commute is different, though. It's impossible to adjust to because the way in which it's bad changes every day. So the tension of not knowing what will be bad, and when it will be bad, and not being able to control those things, means we're unable to use our outstanding mental abilities to adjust.

Here's the clincher, though: Even though people tell themselves it won't happen to them, a bad commute spills over into the rest of the day for almost everyone. If you have a bad commute on the way to work and you walk into the office in a bad mood, that's the mood you're likely to have all day. And if you have a bad commute on the way home, you'll probably still be grouchy by the time you go to bed.

3. Know when it's not about your job.

I'm not certain whether this is good news or bad news, but the connection between your job and your happiness is overrated. In general, the kind of work you do isn't going to have huge bearing on whether you're happy or not.

To be sure, your work can make you unhappy (see No. 2 above, for example), but work isn't going to give you the key to the meaning of life or anything like that.

Still, you can do a quick check to make sure you have a job that's good for you. A good job:

• Stretches you without defeating you
• Provides clear goals
• Provides unambiguous feedback
• Provides a sense of control

If you have these things in your job and you're still not happy, it's not your job -- it's you.

So maybe it's time to start looking inside yourself to figure out what's wrong, instead of blaming everything on your job. I'm a big fan of getting help when you feel stuck. Sure, we can all get ourselves through life, but it's often easier to get where you want to be faster if you have someone to help you overcome your barriers.

To this end, you need to know if you need a career coach or a shrink. And if your job meets the criteria on the above list, you could probably use help from a mental health professional in order to find ways to get happier.

4. Do good deeds.

Help people. Be kind. Don't think about what you get in return. Just be nice. In this way, you can make the world a better place in the job you have right now.

Take personal responsibility for your happiness during the day, and do things that make you feel good. You've heard a lot of this before. If you go to the gym, your mood will get better (and your mind will be sharper). If you eat healthy food, you feel better than if you go to McDonald's for lunch. And if you do random acts of kindness, you get as much out of it as the person you're being kind to.

But most importantly, stop looking for your work to give your life meaning. The meaning of life is in your relationships. Cultivate them. A good job is a nice thing to have, but only in the context of larger meaning.

If you're happy outside of work, where you don't rely on your boss or your company, then finding happiness at work will be that much easier.

MY THOUGHTS

i agree that spending too much time on the road affects your demeanor at work. these are good tips. but i like number 4 best. "do good deeds" make people feel good. you can't win all the time. but what does it matter. one happier person because of one good deed more than makes up for those who will never be happy no matter what you do. i'll sleep on that thought.